How to be more confident is one of the most asked questions that I get from my clients and students. Having worked in the creative industries for over 24 years I have met people with tonnes of confidence and others who are incredibly shy. (Many actors I have met are shy!)
I used to be incredibly shy myself. I forced myself to take drama classes, but would feel sick with fear every time I went on stage. Jump forwards to now, and I have spoken live on television, and even read the lottery numbers out for a New Year Special to over 10 million people!
Now I’m not saying that you want to go on stage or deliver a live broadcast (but that might be your long term goal!). Sometimes we need a bit more confidence to deliver that project or stand up in front of our colleagues to deliver a presentation, but right now the very thought of it might make you want to run and hide under the covers.
Ways to make you more confident
There are ways that I can help you to be more confident. It doesn’t happen over night, but small steps lead to greater results in the long run.
Start with why
You might have a particular reason that you want to be more confident.
I would start by imagining yourself at that moment in the future.
How do you feel?
How do you look?
Who is there supporting you in person, or behind the scenes?
Next I want you to imagine what the worst thing would be if it happened.
You might be wondering why on earth I would ask you that. Being able to think about the worst actually helps us to prepare for it, and by preparing for the worst (even if it doesn’t happen) can help to take some of the fear away from it.
What would your plan B look like if the worst happened?
Why could you go to for help, support or skill sharing to make it happen?
There are other areas that you need to work on for your future confidence
Posture and the way you hold yourself.
This is something that takes time, but there is a quick 2 minute fix that you can do before you have to speak in public or go to a job interview. They call it The Wonder Women Pose.
Standing with your feet hip width apart and your hands on your hips with your head held up high. This can actually lower the stress hormones in your body and increase testosterone, tricking your body into believing you are more confident.There is always an element of having to make ourselves slightly more uncomfortable before we can move forwards to the next level of confidence.You can find more about this in these articles and podcast that I created.
Your voice and the language you use.
We need to remove the just and the sorry from our vocabulary, both on and offline. I go into detail about this in the above podcast.
The main reason for removing these, is that it makes the person that you are talking to think that you aren’t capable or that you don’t have the confidence to deliver what you are promising. You know that isn’t the case, so you need to tell them that too!
Sometimes you need more help to grow your confidence and creative career. You might feel that your lack of confidence is holding you back. That is when mentoring can really make a difference. I have seen such incredible results from my mentoring clients when they opened up and we worked on building their confidence. You can find out more here: Mentoring
I know from my own experience in the past, that it can hinder you getting what you want from your career until you address it.
These other articles might help you too: